লেবেল

লেবেল

বুধবার, ১২ জুন, ২০১৩

Adult Bangla Sms Part : 01

Adult Bangla Sms Part : 01

I wish I were a ring Upon my girlfriend's hand, 'Cause everytime she'd wipe her rear I'd see the promised land....

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Are these your eyes, I found them between my breasts!

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Hello!Im a little alien called Kan.I have taken the form of a mobile

phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with

your thumb!

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I once had a ONE-2-ONE night with a VIRGIN.She teased me till i got an ERICKSON.sucked me till my face went ORANGE till i busted my load of SEIMEN over her NOKIAS.

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I hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 69 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks & sex appeal, remain silent & report 2 my bedroom.

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A man was looking at a painting 4 a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he was doing & he answered - waitng 4 autumn.

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GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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American students say : people who never experience good sex and do not perform well in bed, usually read their SMS messages with their right hand.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: Wanna play *Magic*? She says: What's that? He says: We go to my place, have sex and than you disappear!

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A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone. Amitabh bachan in KBC

Question for 10 lac to Sardar jee

What is the colour of your wife's underwear?

Option 1 : White

Option 2 : Grey

Option 3 : Black

Option 4 : Blue

Sardar jee : Can i phone a friend?

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Sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temptation, putting his location in a

woman's destination. Do you understand the explanation or do you need a

demonstration?

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A peach is a peach,a plum is a plum,A kiss ain't a kiss without some tongue.So

open up your mouth and close you eyes and give your tongue some exercises!!

There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ...NO SEX ! A girl for First the time was handling a boy's cock. After some time, some drops

came out, she asked wat's that? The boy said:Yeh Khushi ke AANSOO hai.

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Niple niple little star ...can i suck you in my car ...up above the breast so

have...always milky never dry...let me touch it never shy...in the bra it

will be dry ...

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Q: What is a kiss?

A: Very simple, its an enquiry at the top floor about the vacancy in the ground.

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When I went to the Madras,

I fucked a lady on the grass...



When I insert inch One,

She says its none...



When I insert inch Two

She says its few...



When I insert inch Three,

She says its free...



When I insert inch Four,

She says its i want more...



When I insert inch Five,

She says its just like a knife...



When I insert inch Six,

She says its fix...



When I insert inch Seven,

She says i m feeling in a heaven...



When I insert inch Eight,

She says its great...



When I insert inch Nine,

She says its hole of mine...



When I insert inch Ten,

She says are you a donkey or a man...

Submitted By : Syed Mohsin Ali, Submit

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Sex is like a restaurant, sometimes u get good service, sometimes bad service, sometimes no service and many times u hav 2 be happy wid self service.

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If u hav 2 eggs between ur 2 legs u r a man but if u hav 4 eggs

between ur 2 legs don't think u r a superman someone is F**king u

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Did u know meaning of WOMEN?

"W"ant

"O"ne

"M"an for

"E"very

"N"ight

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how is sex related to maths?..add two person and a bed..substract

cloths..divide the legs..multiply the strokes..and the result is

satisfucktion..!aha!!!

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A woman married

a one legged man.

She wrote to her

mother:

"My husband only has

ONE FOOT".

Her Mother

replied:

"You are lucky,

your papa has

ONLY 5 INCHES".

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Girl to Doctor: My mobile got stuck in my vagina since last 4 days in

vibration mode.

Doctor: OK, I will remove this easily.

Girl: Just recharge the battery.

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A gud friend is like a gud bra... hard 2 find- comfortable-

supportive- prevents u from falling- holds u tight- and is always close 2 ur

heart!

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2 men went to fuck a girl.

1st came out after fucking a girl n said...

''My wife is better''

2nd went in ,fuck a girl... Came out n said...

''U were right, your wife is better..

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In chemistry class teacher ask 2 a Girl. what is nitrate?

Girl(sharma k) sir,night rate Rs1500/ hotel k bhi aap pay karo gay.

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How To Teach Mathmatics To A Girl.

1st add lips

2nd minus clothes

3rd divide legs

and then start Multiplication in the Sweetest Point.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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Always start your day with a lot of... S E X

S - SMILE

E - ENERGY

X - XCITEMENT

Come here,take off urs pants and knickers, get on top of me, enjoy until u get satisfied, loving urs.....toilet!

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Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite,

my lovely pyjamas

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Press down down more Ok more YES ahh ohh yes almost there yeah oh shit harder SO GOOD ! mmmmm That's how I sex on text !

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I really deeply wish tat u r here with me in my room. on my bed & lights off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my glow in the dark watch.

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He came at night,

explored my body,

got on top of me,

touched me,

he bit, sucked, swalowd,

when he was satisfyed,

he left,

i was hurt,

BLOODY... MOSQUITO !!!!

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BUY A SCOOTY.....PICK UP A BEAUTY, DRINK A FROOTY.... TAKE HER TO OOTY, REMOVE HER NIGHTY...DO UR DUTY..AFTER 9 MONTHS ... GET A CUTY

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The most difficult golf course in the world is... "Women Hole" any

style you play... as many shots you try... & as much perfection you have... you

can never get your balls in...!!!

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What's the closest thing to a woman's period?

Your salary.

It comes once a month,

lasts About 3 or 4 days and if it doesn't come, everything's fucked

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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but

when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!

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4 road signs which stands in front of a womans vagina....

1)Caution-dark tunnel. 2)Drive carefully-road wet n slippery. 3)Go slow.4) Men

at work

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Richman to poorman- "How-come ur penis so big? Poorman-replied:

"B'coz in my childhood i had no other toys to play"!!!

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During sexual session the girl says: "u r like a mobile phone!"

Boy: "Do I vibrate a lot?"

Girl: "No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network

Qus: Who is senior,

PENIS or VAGINA.

A:VAGINA

b'cos PENIS always stands up when he sees a VAGINA..So respect the seniors!

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Q: Wats d definition of a 'lesbian?' A: Just another damn Woman.....

tryin 2 do a man's job!!!.

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Modern medicines: Fucknostat, Sexprazole, Sucksproxyvon, Hugglofnac,

Kisstopache, Spermicidin, Breastajin, Ejaculatomol, Vaginalgin, Penisciloc,

Orgasmofen.

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Similarity between Viagra & Rail reservation counter? Both make you

stand for 1 hour for a 2 minute job...

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Love is a Gambling, Don't play with it

Guys get fun, Girls get blame

10 minutes of fun, 9 months of pain

Then a baby comes out without any name.

Enjoy it or think it before you do it.

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A Peach is Peach, A Plum is Plum

A Kiss isn't a Kiss without some tongue

So Open your mouth, Close your eyes

and Give your tongue some exercise,.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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Always start your day with a lot of... S E X

S - SMILE

E - ENERGY

X - XCITEMENT

so make S E X a daily habit, and youll always B SUCSEXFUL! in LIFE.

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Come here,take off urs pants and knickers, get on top of me, enjoy until u get satisfied, loving urs.....toilet!

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Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite,

my lovely pyjamas.

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Press down down more Ok more YES ahh ohh yes almost there yeah oh shit harder SO GOOD ! mmmmm That's how I sex on text !

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I really deeply wish tat u r here with me in my room. on my bed & lights off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my glow in the dark watch.

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BUY A SCOOTY.....PICK UP A BEAUTY, DRINK A FROOTY.... TAKE HER TO OOTY, REMOVE HER NIGHTY...DO UR DUTY..AFTER 9 MONTHS ... GET A CUTY

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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but

when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!

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During sexual session the girl says: "u r like a mobile phone!"

Boy: "Do I vibrate a lot?"

Girl: "No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network
It is said that inzamam don't understand english. Once commentator asked, "Hay inzi your wife had a baby last week, is this true?". Inzi said, "first of all i thanks to Allah and then credit goes to all boys,
they really worked hard especially afridi done very well. If they continue we
can have another chance.
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I like your style - I like your class - but most of all i like your ass!
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HOW 2 SATISFY A WOMAN: caress excite cuddle fascinate spoil kiss rub tease pamper console worship respect & love. HOW 2 SATISFY A MAN: blow job .
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Types of arse ...
(_!_)An arse (__!__)Fat arse (!)Tight arse (_?_)Dumb arse (_*_)Sore arse (_zzz_)Tired arse (_E=mc2_)Smart arse (_x_)Kiss my arse!
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Do you like maths?if so add a bed subtract ur clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
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SEASON DHAMAKA OFFER
Send your girlfriend to me and win a baby
HURRY UP
First ten will get twins
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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!
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Why do women have orgasms during sex??? It gives them something to moan about even when they are fuc***g enjoyin themselves.
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Mobilink regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u. We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u not even a network.
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23 useless parts on a mans body.20 nails u cant hammer.2 balls u cant throw &1 cock that cant "crow" dont laff ladies?? UR PUSSY CANT CATCH MICE
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A girl who opens her hands recieves gifts, who opens her heart receives love, who opens her legs receives happiness .
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A teacher asked "wot part of the body goes to heaven first?" A child replied "feet" - coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
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A man said 2 his doctor 'everytime I look in the mirror I get an erection' the doctor said 'That's because u look like a cunt!
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Peter Peter Pumpkin eater had a wife & liked to beat her smacked her twice around da head F**ked her arse & went 2 bed!
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Jack & Jill went up da hill 2 have a little fun.But stupid Jill forgot da pill and now they have a son.
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Sex is evil and evil's a sin. but sins are forgiven so lets get stuck in!!

If your right leg was thanksgiving and Your left leg was Christmas could I meet U between the holidays?
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A teacher asked "wot part of the body goes to heaven first?" A child replied "feet" - coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
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I want triplets You want twins. Lets get in bed and see who wins!
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He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine!
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How to impress a woman: compliment her, kiss her, love her, tease her, protect her, listen to her, support her. How 2 impress a man: Show up naked, bring beer!!.
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What is hard and long and full of semen? >>> Submarine <<<
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Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game!
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When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $$$ per minute.!
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A cat and a rooster sat by a lake, the cat fell in the lake, the rooster laughed! LESSON: when there's a wet pussy, there's a happy cock!
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Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure.
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1 day there was tis naked man N elephant, da elephant looks at the naked man 4 a few seconds, then ask da naked man, 'HOW CAN U BREATH THRU THAT LITTLE THING?'
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I want to suck you... I want to lick you... I wanna move my tongue all over you... I want to feel you in my mouth... that's how u... eat an ice cream...
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if u were a drum id bang u, if u were a pig id pork u, if u were a flower id root u, if u were a nail id screw u, but cos ur a sweetie ill make love 2 u!
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When I was born I got the choice, or a major dick, or a fine memory. I am not able to remember what I did choose.
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Man says to his wife: Let me take a picture of your breasts, then I can always look at them. Wife: Let me take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged.
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Who is stronger, Man Or Woman? A: A woman bcoz she lifts 2 mountains on her chest while a man lifts 2 stones with the help of a crane.


A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone.
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Son on his honeymoon phoned his mom asking what 2 do. MOM : Put ur biggest thng on her hairiest thing. SON : got my nose in her armpit. Now what?
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Sex is a sensation caused by temptation when a man puts his location in a woman's destination. Do u get my explanation, or do u need a demonstration?!
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There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ...NO SEX !
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Sex is like pizza. When its good, its VERY GOOD. When its bad, its Still pretty good!!
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